Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Don't Always Listen To Your Constituents

Frequently, constituents will stand up at a public meeting and begin to cite some statistics which they think will bolster their preferred position on the matter being discussed.

It is important that locally elected officials not be swayed by these statistics during a public meeting.  83.6% of the constituents are making them up and the other 34% are just wrong; they are providing inaccurate information.

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

This Might Be an Ideal Place for Local Public Officials Who Want to Make a Fresh Start

Friday, August 9, 2013

More Examples of Local Government Paraprosdokians

More examples of Paraprosdokians - those wonderful figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected ,yet many times humorous - which are appropriate for local public officials.  
1. Many locally elected bodies, to be sure they hit the target, shoot first then call whatever they hit the target.

2. The men and women who serve in local government public offices don't really get any smarter while they are in office; they just learn how to act better in public.

3. Serving as a local public officer reinforces the notion that you are never too old to hear something utterly stupid in a public meeting.

Does Serving In Local Government Affect Your Judgment and Decision-Making Ability? your

The wife of a local elected official was concerned because her husband was thinking about running for his fourth term in local government.  She was concerned because she was beginning to believe that his serving so long in local government was beginning to affect his decision-making ability.
While visiting with her family doctor during her annual physical, she explained her concerns to her doctor, asking if a person serves many terms in public office can it affect their judgment and decision-making ability?  Her doctor explained it very well could; however, there was a simple test she could perform at home to actually see if her husband’s judgment and decision-making process was affected by serving so many terms in local government.
He said, “Tonight when you go home fill your bathtub half-way with water.  On the edge of the tub place a teaspoon, a coffee cup, and a two-gallon plastic bucket.  When your husband comes home, ask him to empty the tub the fastest way he can."

The wife said, “Oh, I understand – If he chooses the bucket because it would be the fastest way to empty the tub – faster than the spoon or the teacup - then there is no problem with him running for a fourth term in public office.”  

"No,” replied her Doctor.  If he pulls the drain plug and asks what do you want me to do now dear, then serving in public office has not affected his judgment."

Monday, August 5, 2013

City Council Member Keeps Losing Temper

The wife of a City Council member goes to the doctor, worried about her husband's temper. The doctor asks, "What's the problem?"

The woman says, "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every time my husband comes home from a city council meeting or a meeting of a committee he serves on, he seems to lose his temper for no reason. It scares me."

The doctor says, "I have a cure for that. When it seems that your husband is getting angry, just take a glass of water and start swishing it in your mouth. Just swish and swish but don't swallow it until he either leaves the room or calms down."

Two weeks later the woman comes back to the doctor looking fresh and reborn.

The woman says, "Doctor that was a brilliant idea! Every time my husband came home from a city council meeting and started losing it, I swished with water. I swished and swished, and he calmed right down! How does a glass of water do that?"

The doctor says, "The water itself does nothing. It's keeping your mouth shut when he arrives home after a city council meeting that does the trick."