Monday, August 9, 2010

Township Heros

A large manufacturing plant was ablaze and the raging fire was more than the City’s Fire Department could handle. A call for mutual aid was made and within minutes a nearby township had it's one and only truck on the way; however when the bystanders saw the old dilapidated truck driving up they all started to laugh. Their laughter soon stopped when the old truck sped right through the checkpoint and drove directly into the blaze.

Totally surrounded by fire, the small group of township fire fighters jumped off their truck and began spraying water in every direction. Within minutes they single handedly put out the blaze and saved the plant. The President of the manufacturing plant was so impressed with the township fire fighters he took out his personal checkbook and presented them with a check for $1000 to show his appreciation.

A news crew filming at the scene captured this act of generousity on film and the reporter ran over to the township fire fighters. He asked them what they were going to do with the $1,000 they just received. “Well, since our township board keeps cutting our maintenance budget to reduce the tax levy we’re going to use this money to buy new brakes for our rundown fire truck”.

Twelve County Supervisors

A man from a small midwestern county was arrested for his fifth OWI while out on bail and driving with a revoked license. The DA believed this was a slam dunk case; however finding twelve acceptable jurors became a seemingly impossible task. Everyone on the jury pool had to be excused because they were either a relative, business partner, personal friend, hunting buddy, fishing pal or drinking companion of the accused.

Frustrated by this situation the Judge instructed the bailiff to go downstairs to the County Board room where a County Board meeting was in progress. He demanded the bailiff bring back 12 County Supervisors who would sit on the jury. Both the DA and the defense lawyer were astounded that the judge took such decisive action however both were glad the trial could now proceed. When the bailiff returned with 2 County Board Members the judge informed them that they were being sequestered as jurors and they were expected to be unbiased in rendering a fair verdict. The trial finally began.

A preponderance of evidence was presented against the accused yet the trail lasted just under 30 minutes. It was clear to everyone in the courtroom that the defendant was definitely guilty of his fifth OWI. After the Judge sent the Jury (the empanelled County Board Members) to jury-room to deliberate he began to clear off his bench as everyone anticipated a quick verdict.

After five hours passed the Judge was out of patience and asked the bailiff to go down to the Jury room to find out how things were going. When the bailiff returned, the Judge asked, "Well are they close to reaching a verdict?" The bailiff shook his head and said, "Your Honor, they’re not even half way through the nominating speeches for the position of Jury foreman!"