Tuesday, July 24, 2012

The Borough Manager's Painful Operation

A local hospital submitted a request to its local borough planning commission for a permit to expand its existing facility.  Strongly opposed by the borough manager, the hospital's permit request was denied.  Tension between the borough government and hospital staff was now at an all time high. 

A few weeks passed and, as luck would have it, the borough manager's appendix ruptured and he was rushed to the  hospital's emergency room and taken in for emergency surgery.  Following his surgery, the doctors and nurses who operated on him met with him in the recovery room to assure him the operation was a success and all went well. 

After being taken up to his room, he began to feel a terrible pain in his lower abdomen region.  It was an odd sensation as if something were pulling tightly on his skin and stomach hairs.

The pain seemed to grow more intense as time went on and he began to worry that perhaps his surgery went worse then he was told.  He just had to see what was causing the pain and making him feel so uncomfortable.  Mastering the courage, he lifted the bed sheet and pulled up his hospital gown to look down where they operated. 
 
There across his lower abdomen were four wide strips of surgical adhesive tape - the broad thick kind that doesn't come off easily.  Written on the strips of tape with a large red magic marker was:  Get well soon from all your friends at the hospitalEvery doctor and nurse, as well as most of the staff including those who worked in the cafeteria and in the maintenance department, had signed the tape. 

Monday, July 9, 2012

Today Would Have Been The Day

A city council member's wife awakes during the night at 1:30 a.m. to find her husband is not in bed.  She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him.  She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot cup of coffee.  He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall and she watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee.

"What's the matter, dear? Are you worried about the public hearing tomorrow?" she whispers as she steps into the room.
 
He looks up from his coffee and says, "No dear.   Don’t you remember?  It's the 20th anniversary of the day we met".  She can't believe he has remembered and starts to tear up.

He continues, "We started dating 20 years ago today.  I was 18 and you were only 16," he says solemnly. 
 
Once again, his wife is touched and comes to tears. "Yes, I do," she replies.  The city  council member pauses; the words were not coming easily.

"Do you remember your father caught us in the back seat of my car?" 
 
"Yes, I remember," said the wife, slowly lowering herself into the chair beside him. 
 
He continued. "Do you remember when he shoved his shotgun in my face and said, 'Either you marry my daughter or I will send you to prison for 20 years?'"
 
"I remember that too," she replied softly.

He wiped another tear from his cheek and said, "I was just thinking I would have been released today."